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relationship health forum?

on Thu 15 Mar - 14:15
i have seen a few posts about sex in consang relationships. there isnt really a place to discuss that, as it seems most people agree to just put it into the topic thread.

but, it got me thinking... is there a place to discuss relationship health in general? this would include things like discussing love languages, sex, mental health issues and how to approach them, etc.

it could be quite useful to have a place to discuss all the topics of maintaining a healthy loving relationship amid all of lifes stresses, which are often worse for consang people if for no other reason than because there is nowhere else to go.

i can tell you that it can be difficult to discus relationship issues when you are not legally permitted to. i myself am married and polyamorous, but if i breathed a word of that to my command, i could potentially lose my job, lose my security clearance, and even be put in jail. so, i discuss such things on various online forums, anonymously.

so far, i have dealt with all kinds of mental health issues in the people i love. im sure im not the only one who has probably experienced such things.

thoughts?
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Re: relationship health forum?

on Thu 15 Mar - 14:53
Interesting idea, Olek. There was some discussion earlier about creating a forum for sexual health, but it never went anywhere. Your idea of a relationship health forum would be an umbrella for that.

You mention about love languages. Do you mean this? The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman (link) My current hobby horse.

Unrequited folks have some unique, uh, issues too. Could such a forum include those?

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Re: relationship health forum?

on Thu 15 Mar - 15:24
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yes, chapmans five love languages is exactly what i was thinking of there.

so far as unrequited, i think it would be a good place for them as well. it would pretty much be a forum dedicated to maintaining healthy relationships in any situation, even if that means that ending a relationship is the only way to stay healthy.

for instance, i have counseled a LOT of soldiers on how to work through infidelity. it is one of those dark secrets that the army doesn't like to talk about. there are resources for nearly everything, but they are sorely lacking in cases of infidelity. often, just being able to get the soldier to focus on a plan for moving forward is all they need. they may not be able to get what they really want, but can still maintain their own sanity and find happiness.

in cases of unrequited love, the best advice would probably be along the same lines. there is a lot involved in the process of acceptance and moving forward, and most of it is difficult to see if you are the one hurting...
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Re: relationship health forum?

on Thu 15 Mar - 21:45
So far it seems like General Discussion suffices for this, though you're right there aren't many resources elsewhere. It's not a bad idea; if others here feel they'd like a forum for it, then yes definitely we should make it.
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Re: relationship health forum?

on Fri 16 Mar - 0:19
I am a bit concerned that the number of forums is ballooning, but seeing as how the number of topics and posts in General Discussion blows away all the other forums except for Introductions, I think it is worthwhile to essentially split the forum into smaller bites and foster more of this kind of conversation.
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Re: relationship health forum?

on Fri 16 Mar - 19:54
hopefully, this forum will grow large enough to NEED a lot of sub-forums.  right now, i think the general forum is probably sufficient, but as the forum grows, it will eventually get kinda bogged down.  

im thinking, if a topic ever goes from being on the front page to the second page withing a given time frame, that will be when it is needed.  for instance, if i post a new topic and within 48 hours of inactivity, it is no longer visible.  

the downside of waiting until then is that when you go to start that forum, you would want to either move threads into it so people can find relevant information, or just let them get lost in the archives...
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Re: relationship health forum?

on Fri 16 Mar - 20:17
I could be persuaded if we knew how many threads now in General would fit into a Relationship Health forum and how many are on other topics. If there are a lot of threads now in General that would fit into a Relationship Health forum, that would be hard evidence that the RH forum would be useful.

Moving the threads would not be a problem if there are not more than a hundred or so of them.

Olek, if you identify the relationship health threads now in General and the admins decide to create the RH forum based on that evidence, I'll move 'em. Just screenscrape the thread titles and post all of them in a followup on this thread. How does that sound?

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UN

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