Starting a family

Hello, I’m 20 years old and I joined this forum with my girlfriend, who is 38, both of us being trans lesbian and poly. We’ve had some thoughts about starting a family but with neither of us having the ability to actually have children we’d love for a cis woman (or women) to join our fold. We hope to have open minded relations with our children including consensual incest (when they come of age) and possibly nudist ideals (due to my feelings on the human body being open and natural to everything). We’re happy to be able to join and have a lot to look forward to and work on so we can become a family. We are long distance with me in Indiana and her in Texas. But I’ve had relations with my halfsister who is 18 but our family looked down on our feelings for one another and we were caught and I haven’t spoken to her for a long time now. But we want our children to be able to have that choice when they’re at the age of consent. We’re happy to be able to have joined.

Just to clarify: Are you simply talking about being possibly open to relationships with your hypothetical children once grown, or are you talking about raising them to become your lovers once they're grown up? The former is okay, the latter is grooming and is not okay even though they'll be of age when the sexual activities take place. I get quite cautious when someone mentioned starting a family where the children (not yet even born) would become the lovers of their parents, because it's very often a euphemism for grooming (and I've been on A LOT of websites about consensual incest over the course of my adult life). Now, I have absolutely nothing againt parent/offspring relationships, I was with my dad for a number of years... HOWEVER, it was something that happened spontaneously, neither of us expected to feel the way we did about each other. What I'm saying is that the parent should not be attempting to influence a young persons budding sexuality, rather that such things should be allowed to develop naturally and in their own time. There is a chance that your children may come to you of their own accord (as we aren't sure to what degree consang is hereditory), but there is also a chance that your children will have no interest in you or any other relative and will want to go on with their lives as a regular.

I need to assess your intentions before I can upgrade your account. Thanks in advance for your understanding.

No my what I mean is I’d like to raise them with open minds so that when the time comes and they’re at the age of consent, they can feel comfortable to express any possible feelings they have toward us.

Based on your response, I have upgraded your account, although I want to make sure Jane is comfortable with that. So I say provisionally: Welcome aboard!

Yes, welcome aboard and thanks for explaining, it wasn't too clear. I have to ask purely so we know what type of people we're letting in. We have a friendly and helpful community here, but that hasn't just sprung up out of the blue, it has always required vigilance and safeguarding from admins and mods to ensure that we only let in those who belong. For this reason, if we spot any potential red flags we have to ask certain questions, my apologies if I appeared abrupt, but I hope you understand our reasons.

Jane

I missed this post. I think it's very interesting and it reminds me of my own situation. I would never have fallen for my daughter if I had not been intimate with her mother first. Watching her mature into a younger version of her mother is what opened the door. Otherwise I would have missed it completely as weird as it sounds. This is my approach to consang, I guess.